We all know that there’s “stupid” people who “don’t get it”. They come to us and tell how things need to be done. They act like idiots and don’t respect our comments, ideas or thoughts.

Here’s what I have to deal with:

The orangehead story
Me: “Here’s a list of games we can play then.”

Orangehead: “But I won’t participate unless there’s good games.”

Me: Well, what games you want? Why cannot you show some support? This is a team effort, no time to go solo. Everybody needs to show some team spirit here!”

Me thinking secrectly: (What a goddamn orangehead. This type of situation doesn’t very often and this dude is already ruining the plans even before we get started)

And so on
No matter how much we force our own opinion, they just don’t get it.

Orangeheads.

Here’s one lil thing that has helped me to see to the other side of the fence. It requires a big drill, but after there’s a hole – I can take a peek and have little more understanding why these orangeheads act like they do.

The drill philosophy states that: “People do the best decisions from their point-of-view”.

If I start thinking this… I can think that perhaps the Orangehead in the story isn’t that orangehead after all. Maybe he really wants to participate, but is concerned that there aren’t good games to play. Maybe he would be fully supporting the plan, but just wants to ensure that there are really good games to play.

If I label him (in my mind – or in a blog post for that matter) as an “orangehead” I’ve sort of like “already made up my mind what I think about this chap”. This calls for confrontation. I defend my view, he defends his view… and it’s a battle. Instead, if I think that this orangehead, I mean fellow chap, is doing the best decisions from his point-of-view I can gain more understanding and perhaps help find some middleground.

Here’s an almost true story.

3 game producers enter a restaurant. They order food and drinks. After a bit of waiting, the meal arrives to the table. Producers start eating and one of them makes a remark about how bad the food is. The other comments nods his head and says “same here, I’ll never visit this place ever again”. Third producer says that he thinks the food is okay.

Time goes on, and food disappears from the plates… and it’s time to call waitress to bring the bill.

When the waitress asks “Was all good? Food fine?” every producer nods their heads and says “yeh, sure” or “definitely” and so on.

Whih brings me to my question.

Is this the way things happen?

Is it typical for producers (or for anybody for that matter) to act this way? Is it okay to say “well, I didn’t like the food to be honest”? Is it okay (or mandatory) to do similar at work (like for example when somebody messes things up, we don’t directly say anything to him, but speak bad words behind his back)? Are we trying to protect their feelings or what’s going on?

Why we are like this? (Are you?)

Is this be the correct way to behave?

I just lost one post accidentally. Sigh, I always say people to use Notepad (or something) to write longer stuff in the net. Note to self: listen to myself.

Writing the post again, gimme a moment…

I can.

I’m sort of the Master of the Universe when it comes to concentration. It’s like sinking into a vampire daytime sleep type of trance.

Here’s some examples:

• I can sleep on sofa while radio or tv or other apparatuses are on.
• I can read Donald Duck comic books while eating and totally sink into trance where nobody can wake me up. After series of questions I just say “Huh? Did you ask something?”
• I can stare computer screen – and code 110% well – without realizing that somebody just cleaned the room*.

Only a cold, wet dog rhinarium touching my calf can wake me up.

This might be annoying to others (who might have something to ask from me)… but at least there’s some benefits on the “getting stuff done” side.

How’s your concentration?

* I can concentrate pretty well as long as they keep the vacuum cleaner far, far away.

When I wanted to learn about the Unity game engine, I hoarded everything possible about it, as fast as I could get (out of pure curiosity and for fun). I read tons of tutorials, forums stuff, tested some Unity games, even read one book about development, tried some things on my own. I think all this happened in a very short time period (talking about weeks) while doing some other stuff.

This is the same when I get interested about some computer (or board) game. I read tons of reviews online, print some to read them offline. Check videos… all in a very short time period.

I’m like that: when I want to learn new things, I want to get tons of information and absorb everything possible as soon as possible.

The good side of course is that, when I’m really motivated to learn something new I can get the basics pretty quick. The bad side on the other hand…

Well, hmm. I think there’s no bad sides. Not when hoarding stays in a sensible level.

It’s good to be a hoarder.

Are you like this?

Here’s what I’ve done in the past year:

• Washed my hands all the time. Well, you know – often.
• Use hand wash anti-bacteria stuff. You know, the thing what you take with you when you go to foreign countries.
• Stopped drinking alcohol (has been this for a year now – don’t ask me why since I don’t know)
• Ate less meat (in fact, I cut eating a lot, and nowadays only eat chicken. Delicious chicken.)
• Exercise regularly (outdoor activities every day), but less than 2 years ago.
• Minimize taking drugs (you can make funny comments out of this)
• Don’t smoke (never really have)
• Keep my stress level low. Or away. I don’t really have stress, sort of.
• Perhaps concentrated more on “not getting ill” rather than “staying healthy”.
• Complain more. Well, occasionally. In this blog for example.

I’ve never been so ill than I have been during the last year. (Well, maybe I have but makes a better story this way). During the last year, every couple of months I had got flu or fever or sore throat or something that makes me ponder “I’m not feeling well.”

Well, there’s one thing I’m pondering. I wonder if “trying not to get ill” is the issue here. Or, perhaps I have the issue with the loop “I know I will get ill every 2 months”, and then I get ill. I’m not superstitious but if anybody has a spare rabbit pawn, you can mail them to my house.

10 years ago I cared about healthy/illness as much as rat cares about its buttocks. That would be little. Well known fact. I was never ill. (Another fact that I made up from thin air). Maybe I’ve concentrated too much on this illness stuff that I help make myself ill.

If anyone has a good tip on (1) either staying healthy or (2) how to forget all the fuzz about staying healthy, I’d be glad to hear that out.

Sorry, now I have to go to bathroom to cough some goo balls.

I’m turning 29 years right about now.

Here’s a pretty good lesson that I’ve pondered today: “I gotta think more about doing the stuff I wanna do.”

With increasing number of responsibilities and stuff I’ve been pondering that I also want to ensure that I use my time the way I want to spend it. I could say “spend your time wisely”, but I don’t. Since I can also spend time “unwisely”. I can go to sofa and stair the wall paint for an hour if that’s what makes me tick.

Perhaps you get the point.

After Dead Wake release I’m getting back to drawing board. I have got pretty good publicity. When Hightailed – years ago – got into PC Zone I was totally thrilled – and had the same feeling when Dead Wake got into PC Gamer zombie edition (the issue which I unfortunately could not get to myself). But you can’t buy stuff with just publicity alone.

Besides publicity I’ve been also earning some donut money from this whole gaming stuff. Okay, bit more than donut money, but it’s not like I could buy a house with the money that my games have brought me.

At least not a very big one.

I guess that’s the next thing that I’m interested in taking. Taking a bigger step. Earning tons of donuts. House-buy much donuts.

So… how do I get more donuts? That’s one thing I’m pondering.

Maybe that’s what I have been pondering too much. Maybe I’ve cared about the financial side and put some mental donuts blocks to myself. Maybe I’ve cared too much about the budgets and shit.

I have master’s degree from some computer biz thing. And studies in marketing. And tons of practical production experience (both from gaming & outside gaming). I’m good at serving people and have done all sorts of cool deals with cool companies (which have brought me quite a bit of donuts – figuratively speaking). I’m pretty good at coming up stuff that people want or could be interested in. I have a very practical approach on things. I’ve been grown up to certain type of approach in “business world”. This is one perspective.

I’m also looking this whole donuts business from another perspective.

I read this book Ignore Everybody and the perspective of that book is quite radical to everything I’ve read & practiced so far. In this book, the author recommends forgetting everything about what the others say – forget about money totally (when doing your own thing). And just do your thing as long as it’s fun. (Read the first chapter online for free and you get the point).

That sort of sums up what indie game production should be.

Has it been like that for me?

I suppose it’s not so black and white. To some extent, yes, it has been like that. To some extent, no, it hasn’t been like that.

Maybe I should just stop thinking donuts.

Forget donuts completely. And start making something totally cool. Something fun without giving a thought on “how many donuts will this thing get to me”.

Perhaps that is the solution.