What’s the Color of Your Tongue? Brown?

Do you say different things about your boss in these situations:
1) In front of boss (will you honestly say what you think when your boss hears you? Do you laugh at his jokes and nod like an idiot on any of his suggestions?)
2) Somewhere else (do you complain about your boss in behind his back, and talk about things you wouldn’t say in front of him?)

Why? Why not?

Juuso Hietalahti


  1. Didn’t mean to offend anyone – my apologies for that.

    I respect all people – be they women or men. Genre doesn’t mean anything to me. There can be good or bad bosses in women and men.

    Like Lumooja said – there was no (at least intended) women hating in these posts.

  2. I agree that most time you should joke about yourself. However I also see life itself as a joke: we don’t know who we are, who made us, where we came from, who controls us, and all such things. Actually we don’t barely know anything. We just know that we experience our existence like living on somekind of ball, which moves around another shiny ball. That’s about it.
    But it might not be the truth either, or not the complete truth at least.
    At the least we know about ourselves. Someone wrote the DNA code for us, but forgot to publish the documentation, and now we have to reverse engineer billions of lines of executable code, great.

  3. On a similar vein to my previous comment, I learned over the years to only joke about yourself. Sure you can joke about a friend/co-worker in front of them and a bunch of people and it may be pretty damn funny, but it may also slowly build up a feeling of resentment in that person the more you do it. So my advice is just joke about yourself as no one can get offended. Some comedians do this to great effect.

  4. Juuso, because they will affect my life if I tell them what I think of them to their face, and commenting in private releases stress. Though it might also be whining.

    And as to “jokes” about women, I’m sure you love being the butt of “jokes” about your sex, race, whatever, even if they’re not true. Right?

  5. Speak ill of no man (or woman). – Benjamin Franklin. I think I’ve even posted that here before, or Juuso has. Anyway, it’s really no very easy to do, because it’s such a habit in most of us. Try it, go for a day without saying one bad thing about someone.

  6. Mine wasn’t a joke.



    @Katherine: hmm, why talk different about someone if they have no effect on your life?

  7. Actually there was no woman hating in these comments, the first was just a fact, the second was a joke (just based on my experience, not facts) :)

  8. Woamn hating much in these comments? I suppose we should just get back in the kitchen and stop expecting to be paid for our work. Come on Juuso, I thought better of you than to let this sort of thing run rampant in your comments. I and many other women I know do not fit everyone’s stereotypes here, but will they go away? No.

    I only talk different about someone behind their back if they really have no effect on my life. I’m honest with anyone that affects my work life (my boss, project managers in charge of projects I’m working on, contractors I’m in charge of). I complained bitterly about the HR manager as they were totally not doing their job but I didn’t want to be fired, but in the end I took it to their boss.

  9. @Raul: What? You have a woman boss. Come on. Be a man. Show her who is in charge.


    @Jeppe: very good pointer. things aren’t always so black & white and ruining somebody’s authority/leadership in front of others indeed might not be a good strategy.

    @Lumooja: Expect to get slapped by large amount of large trouts. Virtual ones at least.

  10. You can’t really trust women. Just ask them how old they are, or if everything is OK. You never get an honest answer :)

  11. As a manager I am (also) hired to question wrong decision/opinions – even if these happens to come from my boss.

    With that said, there are somethings I would a) keep to myself, as it wouldn’t benefit the company b) say it to my boss behind closed doors, as it could ruin his authority in front of the rest of the company.

  12. well i just lose my job because my boss (a women) does not like me :).

    She pretend is my “friend” but she just put a knife in my back.. :(

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